Tag Archive | recovery

Setbacks

How often, it seems, we take two steps forward and one step back.  There are even occasions when we seem to relapse altogether.

Don’t be discouraged when this happens, okay?

“Yeah,” you scoff, “you don’t know how serious this is or how hard it is to turn around.”

But I do.

Anybody who lives any length of time at all has had a few setbacks:  That slip into an old habit or addiction that really knocks you off your feet.

The secret:  Get up, dust yourself off and move forward again.

Dusting yourself off means to forgive, learn from your mistakes and the circumstances that contributed to your setback.

Move forward means take one step at a time back to wellness – toward sobriety or eating… You already know because you’ve done it before.

Next, take hope in this:  Every time you move forward from a setback, you are stronger:  That particular trap won’t get you again!

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My Home

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OR

Being at home in my self

The home in which I live
Is simple and clean,
Most of the time, that is.
If you’re living at all,
You know what I mean:
There are always improvements,
Chores to be done;
Rearranging of furniture,
Fixing this thing and that one…
It seems something is always amiss!

I’ve learned to be at peace
In this home of mine.
Most of the time, that is.
If you’re being at all,
We are of one mind:
There is always new learning,
Wounds to be healed,
Discoveries of every nature,
Knowing how to love and feel;
Such is being at home like this.

Don’t Be Surprised

I started my journey of healing many years ago.

The first leg was a long, steep, difficult path that wound through rocks and thickets so dense, I couldn’t see beyond myself at all.  It’s unpredictability was mind boggling.  I would climb a little higher; then find myself in a hole with no apparent way out.  Some days, I was pleased with what felt like progress, only to fall into a helpless heap of despair the next.

Eventually, the path widened into a road – you know the kind:  Two tracks with plenty of ruts and potholes.  The going was a bit easier and I had more perspective.

I found some nice spots to rest along the way:  Just the right mix of sun and shade, running water near by and soft places for lounging and sleep.

I don’t know how it happened, but I came to another steep, difficult place; in fact, it was more painful and challenging than the first one.  This time, there was no path.  I had to whack my way through the underbrush.  I thought I’d never get through it all!  Perhaps the hardest part was that I blamed myself:  If only I had learned my lesson the first time!  What is wrong with me that I’m back here??

Eventually, I had the pleasure of travelling on wide, well paved roads.  They were straight and level; there were lots of companions.  Loneliness was not even a whisper of a thought.  The camaraderie was wonderful!

Years later, my journey took a turn, and once again, I found myself in a quagmire.  I was dismayed!  This time, I had enough experience and maturity to recognize that this is part of a life-long pilgrimage.  It was still difficult and in some ways, the most painful of all.  I knew what to do:  Keep moving forward, step by step, clearing by clearing.

The moral of my tale?  When you find yourself in a difficult patch, know that you are making progress.  These detours are necessary for continued growth and wellness.  Greet them with dignity; don’t be surprised when they happen.

DIG DOWN

As I have walked through many years of healing and recovery, I have noticed something:
The work I need to do is ever deeper.
Unlike the building of a house, which starts at the foundation; then goes up from there,
Reparation seems to start in more shallow places and go deeper, until it is at the foundational level of all I know, believe and experience; not from my head, but from my heart.
It seems that deeper work requires greater health and maturity.  It calls for strength and wisdom that I simply didn’t have earlier.

 

Do you find yourself facing monsters that “should have died ages ago?”
Take heart!  You are going into the deep regions of your being, where profound healing takes place.
Move steadily forward; dig down to the lowest, most hidden parts;
Let light shine in the darkest corners.

 

Oh, I know, this journey seems to go on forever.  It even appears to go around in the same circle, time after time.  That isn’t the case, however.  Every new insight, step of forgiveness, new truth and breakthrough is yours, a treasure that cannot be taken away.

 

This endeavor isn’t the fast kind of digging, such as what is done with shovels or backhoes; it’s more like an archeological dig:  You are down in the dirt with your toothbrush, unearthing small fragments that could be nothing, or the most amazing artifact ever uncovered.

 

Keep digging.  Bring every little bit to light, where it can be exposed and examined.  Get down to the foundation of who you are, making repairs as you go.  Then enjoy the sweetness of new victory, greater clarity and freedom as you emerge with a more profound sense of yourself than you have ever known!

THE BIGGEST MISTAKE I EVER ALMOST MADE

I met him at the swimming pool;
He invited me to share his lane.
His favor seemed so cool
Offered without seeking gain.

 

He seemed friendly and kind of heart,
So I accepted his invitation.
Such an innocent start
To what could have been devistation.

 

His words seemed genuine and true;
But their deception was well hidden.
It took all I could do
To break free from chains unbidden.

 

We could marry if you’ll do this:
Follow me wherever I go;
We’ll share such love and bliss;
Still his deception did not show.

 

We’ll be together, oh but wait;
Don’t ask too many questions of me;
Come close and stay away;
Commit but let me remain free.

 

And so the confusion marched on,
Until my whole life was undone;
Then came the brightest dawn:
This man is a finagling one.

 

I collected all that remained
Of my self as I left that last day,
Feeling all of the pain,
I courageously went on my way.

 

This was a favor in disguise;
That saved me from injury and sorrow;
Making me much more wise
And preparing me for “tomorrow.”

 

Let my story be a lesson
To any who might trust such a man:
If he brings confusion,
Turn and run as fast as you can!

 

If he tries to take you away
From your family, your friends and your town,
Know there’s a price to pay;
In distress that ever weighs you down.

 

Let me give some friendly advice
That just might help some people at last:
It’s not time to be nice;
Say, “Don’t let the dorr hit your a##”…
On your way out!”

NEW TRUTH

When I was a child,
I learned many things;
Some of them were helpful,
The sort that growing brings.
Then there were the others:
“Truth” that seemd to work back then;
The lessons that needed to change
If misery was to end.

 

“My own needs don’t count;
Don’t think, talk or feel.”
Are rules that had to go
So I’d be free to heal.
That I am a person;
Truth of real humanity;
Whole and acceptable as one
Who is learning how to be.

 

Living is a process
Of learning, growth and change;
It’s part of how we’re made;
It really isn’t strange.
As you search for new truth,
Choose paths of discovery
May you encounter in yourself
The strength of recovery.